Today many parents are discouraging their children from entering a Fraternity when they get to college. I would say that most of these parents were either not in a Fraternity or had a bad experience with a Fraternity while in college. There have been many negative things written about Fraternities, but I would like to share a personal experience that I had with the brothers of Eta Theta Chapter of Sigma Chi at Georgia Southwestern College and advocate for the positive influence that a Fraternity can have on a young man.
My Dad was one of those parents that did not believe that Fraternity life was a good part of the college experience. I say that, but looking back on the situation he never once discussed it with me and later I found out that he to was part of a Fraternity while in school. I guess I just believed, for whatever reason, that I had to lobby my father and sell him on the idea that joining a Fraternity could be a positive experience, so before I ever approached him with the idea I prepared an argument complete with pros and cons of why I should be allowed to join. Clearly, this was the early lawyer coming out in me and on this particular occasion this prepared argument served me well, because either I totally sold my father on the idea that joining a Fraternity was a positive thing or he thought it was a good idea all along and just made me work to prove that I really was committed to the idea. He agreed to let me join and also agreed to help me with some of the fees associated with membership.
I enjoyed the experience of Rush and was given a bid or invitation to join three Fraternities. I felt like the brotherhood at the time was the strongest and I felt most comfortable with the brothers of Sigma Chi and so I accepted the bid to join and after a period of being a pledge, I became a brother. This would turn out to be one of the better decisions I made in my life.
The brothers of Sigma Chi that I came to know during those four years will forever be a part of me and I will always partially credit them for any success I have in life. I don't always keep close contact with many of them, but I know that if I ever needed them they would be there to offer a helping hand and I would do the same for them if they ever needed me. They helped me learn responsibility, the value of hard work, the concept of paying your dues and being rewarded for doing so and the power of corporate community service. Fraternities all over the world raise millions of dollars for a myriad of organizations from the American Cancer Society to our philanthropy of choice The Children's Miracle Network. Fraternities also have fun, but unlike the Hollywood version of Fraternities, this is not their major emphasis. The power of a large group of young men dedicated to each other and dedicated to raising money for a good cause is what most Fraternities are about.
There is one particular experience I had as a member of Sigma Chi that I will never forget and is a perfect illustration of what Fraternities are really about. In 1995, when I was a junior at Georgia Southwestern College, my Dad, after a long battle with cancer died. I had been telling my brothers for a long time that he was not doing well and they had been praying for me and my family during this time. Yes, I said that right, frat boys were praying for each other. I was at the Fraternity house when I got the call from my brother in law that my Dad had passed and I needed to get home. All I had to do was tell one brother this news and I was immediately surrounded with support from the other brothers and was driven by one of my brothers the two hours home that night, even though it was very late and the weather was not particularly good.
The next few days were very difficult, as you can imagine, and I was thinking mostly about my immediate family. On the day of my father's funeral, as I arrived with my family at the graveside I was overcome as I saw that almost every member of my Fraternity, as well as many of the girls from our sister sororities had driven the two hours from my college to support me and be at my Dad's funeral. They all stayed until after the funeral to personally talk with me and offer their condolences. They didn't just send a card or write on my Facebook page or send me an email telling me how sorry they were, they showed up, they were present to physically show their support. These eighteen to twenty-one year old kids didn't know my Dad or really much about him, but they knew that it was a hard time for me and they were there to support me. This meant the world to me to know that I had friends that cared enough about me and my family to take time to be present when I needed them. How many college age kids today would do this for one of their classmates if they didn't have the power of a connection to a brotherhood or sisterhood behind them. I would guess not many.
Fraternities often get a bad reputation and as it is with all organizations there are some bad eggs, but for the most part I am confident in the Fraternal System and I challenge you to explore and educate yourself about the Fraternities and Sororities at your child's college before you forbid them to join. It could mean a life long circle of friends that could be a tremendous support mechanism for your child while they are away at school. I know that I will never forget the members of my Fraternity and other friends that showed up for me that day when I needed them most. In Hoc, to all my brothers of Eta Theta Chapter of Sigma Chi.
My Dad was one of those parents that did not believe that Fraternity life was a good part of the college experience. I say that, but looking back on the situation he never once discussed it with me and later I found out that he to was part of a Fraternity while in school. I guess I just believed, for whatever reason, that I had to lobby my father and sell him on the idea that joining a Fraternity could be a positive experience, so before I ever approached him with the idea I prepared an argument complete with pros and cons of why I should be allowed to join. Clearly, this was the early lawyer coming out in me and on this particular occasion this prepared argument served me well, because either I totally sold my father on the idea that joining a Fraternity was a positive thing or he thought it was a good idea all along and just made me work to prove that I really was committed to the idea. He agreed to let me join and also agreed to help me with some of the fees associated with membership.
I enjoyed the experience of Rush and was given a bid or invitation to join three Fraternities. I felt like the brotherhood at the time was the strongest and I felt most comfortable with the brothers of Sigma Chi and so I accepted the bid to join and after a period of being a pledge, I became a brother. This would turn out to be one of the better decisions I made in my life.
The brothers of Sigma Chi that I came to know during those four years will forever be a part of me and I will always partially credit them for any success I have in life. I don't always keep close contact with many of them, but I know that if I ever needed them they would be there to offer a helping hand and I would do the same for them if they ever needed me. They helped me learn responsibility, the value of hard work, the concept of paying your dues and being rewarded for doing so and the power of corporate community service. Fraternities all over the world raise millions of dollars for a myriad of organizations from the American Cancer Society to our philanthropy of choice The Children's Miracle Network. Fraternities also have fun, but unlike the Hollywood version of Fraternities, this is not their major emphasis. The power of a large group of young men dedicated to each other and dedicated to raising money for a good cause is what most Fraternities are about.
There is one particular experience I had as a member of Sigma Chi that I will never forget and is a perfect illustration of what Fraternities are really about. In 1995, when I was a junior at Georgia Southwestern College, my Dad, after a long battle with cancer died. I had been telling my brothers for a long time that he was not doing well and they had been praying for me and my family during this time. Yes, I said that right, frat boys were praying for each other. I was at the Fraternity house when I got the call from my brother in law that my Dad had passed and I needed to get home. All I had to do was tell one brother this news and I was immediately surrounded with support from the other brothers and was driven by one of my brothers the two hours home that night, even though it was very late and the weather was not particularly good.
The next few days were very difficult, as you can imagine, and I was thinking mostly about my immediate family. On the day of my father's funeral, as I arrived with my family at the graveside I was overcome as I saw that almost every member of my Fraternity, as well as many of the girls from our sister sororities had driven the two hours from my college to support me and be at my Dad's funeral. They all stayed until after the funeral to personally talk with me and offer their condolences. They didn't just send a card or write on my Facebook page or send me an email telling me how sorry they were, they showed up, they were present to physically show their support. These eighteen to twenty-one year old kids didn't know my Dad or really much about him, but they knew that it was a hard time for me and they were there to support me. This meant the world to me to know that I had friends that cared enough about me and my family to take time to be present when I needed them. How many college age kids today would do this for one of their classmates if they didn't have the power of a connection to a brotherhood or sisterhood behind them. I would guess not many.
Fraternities often get a bad reputation and as it is with all organizations there are some bad eggs, but for the most part I am confident in the Fraternal System and I challenge you to explore and educate yourself about the Fraternities and Sororities at your child's college before you forbid them to join. It could mean a life long circle of friends that could be a tremendous support mechanism for your child while they are away at school. I know that I will never forget the members of my Fraternity and other friends that showed up for me that day when I needed them most. In Hoc, to all my brothers of Eta Theta Chapter of Sigma Chi.
Nice job Drew. I remember your Dad's funeral even today. It was amazing to see the line of cars trying to get into Omega to the cemetery. Truly a testament to his life and to that of his family.
ReplyDeleteI agree that sororities don't have to be something out of Animal House either. They are a family for young people who are away from home for the first time in their lives. They are friends that you have for a lifetime.